“Follow the money” – Deed Throat, All the Presidents Men

Good old Mittens has had a hard time connecting with the working class folks he so desperately believes he’s fighting for.  Sure, he doesn’t know what a donut is called, but he can’t be that out of touch, right?  Perhaps a look at the top ten campaign donors can shed some light on whose interests our lovely dueling candidates have in mind. See below.

The good news is that money doesn’t win elections (see Ross Perot and Steve Jobs), unless your idea of being rich means people liking you…and if that is your idea of being rich, then you are my grandma.  

In regards to Romney’s ability to secure the working class I raise the following question: How many working stiffs do you think would actually vote for their boss? I’ll give you a hint: the number looks like one of those, uh, chocolate goodies a donut.

Romney may have Goldman Sachs, but Obama has gold man-sacks.

Source: Federal Election Commission data,  as of Aug. 21, 2012.
Note: Donations are contributions made by an organization’s PAC, not by the organization itself. If you think that at all makes a difference then you’re silly.

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Mesh tank tops…need I say more? Apparently at one point in time, a man (I’m assuming one with a very blonde mustache and mullet) said to himself, “DAMNIT THIS TANK TOP IS JUST TOO DAMN HEAVY!” and then he proceeded to rifle it with bird shot until this miracle was born:

YOLO

p.s. hover your mouse over this guy’s mouth to see the Mesh Tank Top Motto

For those of you toying with the idea of wearing a mesh tank top this summer, please review the figures below, all of which were inspired by a recent trip to Cedar Point in beautiful (read: dystopian) Sandusky, Ohio.  FUN FACT: Sandusky, Ohio was named after Penn State’s former assistant football coach, Gerald Arthur Sandusky, and appropriately so!

Figure 1: Comfort Level by Mesh Tank Top Wearing/Seeing Status, all years ever

(0% = absolute discomfort, 100% = absolute comfort)

Figure 2: Comfort Level for Mesh Tank Top Wearers/Seers by Distance from One Another

Figure 3: Intersection of People Who Wear Mesh Tank Tops and People Who Should Not

Before wikipedia-ing the 2012 Mayan Prophecy, I didn’t really know too much about it.  I still don’t, but what I do know comes from the first line of the entry:

The 2012 phenomenon comprises a range of eschatological beliefs that cataclysmic or transformative events will occur on December 21,2012.

I would also like to note that, while wikipedia may not be the most reputable source, this first line has four (yes, four) citations…none of which are scholarly in any way…so, you know, take that for what you will.

HOWEVER, I think that I’ve found some data (see data source at bottom of page) that indicates that 2012 will in fact be a cataclysmic and transformative year.  Indeed, this very same data gives some indications as to what this transformation will actually look like and entail…and yes…it is unsettling.

Behold…our future

Figure 1: Our Future Present

Okay, well that’s not really our future, that’s our present.  What you’re seeing here are the prevalence trends for overweight and obesity in the United States.  Note that critical point in 2009 where the median proportion of adults that are overweight just barely overtakes the proportion of adults with a body mass index (that’s kg/m²) less than 25.  In addition, the proportion of adults who are obese is also on a noticably upward trend.  Keep in mind, this is just median percentage…meaning that rates of overweight and obesity are higher in 25 other states…and one of those states just happens to be my own: Michigan.

Behold…Michigan’s Future

Figure 2: Michigan’s Future

Good grief.  There you have it.  Based on trends from 1995 to 2010, it is projected that in 2012 the proportion of adults considered neither obese or overweight will be surpassed by its counterparts. A transformative event indeed.

To further illustrate the Mayan 2012 Prophecy, I’ve analyzed the above data using the Stata® 12 statistical software package and rendered the following graphic (see Figure 3).

Figure 3: Stata® 12 Super-visualization of Predictive Margins for Mayan 2012 Prophecy

And this certainly isn’t going to help.

Data Source: Center for Disease Control & Prevention Behavioral Risk Factor Surveillance System, Prevalence and Trends Data, United States & D.C. and Michigan, 1995-2010.

 

So here goes, first post. Lets see if my ability to maintain this blog is, well, maintained…or if it follows the trajectory of my previous attempts at blogging, as shown in Figure 1.

Fun Fact: The alternate title for this figure was “When Blogging Turns into Blerghing”.

 

Figure 1: Level of Interest/Ability to Maintain Your Blog by Blogging Stage